wondering and wandering

“I let my mind wander

and what did it do?

It just kept right on going

until it got back to you

when I let my mind wander”

–Willie Nelson*

*It’s true; I base most major life decisions on Willie Nelson lyrics. So far, so good.

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I left you hanging, didn’t I? I said I would collect votes to decide if I would go to graduate school or not, and then I just left you wondering, for like an entire week, what on earth I have done with my life. It’s so nice of you to care.

The truth is, I am an undiagnosed case of ADHD leftover from the 1980s. Not only am I still enrolled in “Information Seeking, Retrevial and Services” (gag) at UK for the Fall semester, this past week I also applied to and was accepted to grad school at Morehead State University.

Yes. You read that right. At MSU I promptly enrolled in EDUC 611, otherwise known as “Adolescent Behavior,” because I got it in my mind one day that it would be great if I were to become a middle school writing specialist. The bonus would be, that with only 5 classes to take (aside from student teaching) I would have the degree just in time for my own kids to enter middle school.

Sorry you asked now, aren’t you?

Actually, it was Halee’s idea; I just keep forgetting that I’m not in my early twenties like Halee, or the other girls I work with, who talk about grad school and their futures with…actual hope.

John says it’s okay. We are just having our midlife crisis a little earlier than most people.

That’s good, because that might explain why on Thursday I suddenly decided that No Way in Hell did I want to have anything to do with middle school students and instead of sending my transcripts to Morehead on Friday, I spent the evening buying a domain to my very own website. That’s right kids: www.copynoll.com is officially mine. But don’t go there, because there’s nothing there yet. (I have a good friend working frantically to get the site up. Or not. Either way, just stay away for now)

See my big plan (as of Friday, and there was bourbon involved, of course) is to get back to my freelance work full force. I’ll still work at my day job, but if I’m going to expend any extra energy in the evenings, I reasoned that I should do it for cold hard cash, not a GPA. That shows maturity, don’t you think? (I choose to think it does).

Are you still with me?

Yeah, so my mind wanders. Just a bit.

To be completely honest, I don’t know what I want to do right now. I may stay enrolled in either graduate school or I may drop both classes. No idea.

And something about that reminds me of being 25…

2 Comments

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2 responses to “wondering and wandering

  1. Kristina

    I totally feel you on the indecisive thing. I can’t tell you how many ideas have come & gone for me since I’ve been unemployed. But like you, as soon as I really start to delve into them, I remember that I am in fact 32 not 22 and have two kids at home to feed! Lol! It’s rough. Good luck finding your way.

  2. Angie

    Just today I decided that no really, this time I AM going to go back to PT school. But it will change tomorrow. Either way, I sympathize.